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Why do they always have 5K runs for charity? Just once, couldn’t they have a sit for charity or nap for charity?
Synonym: Word used in place of the one you can`t spell.
I don`t understand why people have to "get ready" for bed....I`m always ready for bed.
I just responded to a text message with: I can`t hear you, you`re breaking up.
Has it ever occurred to optimists and pessimists that the glass is refillable?
Summer needs to slow the hell down.
If Crunch Berries aren`t considered fresh fruit I don`t think this diet is going to work out.
I bet there`s a rapper trying to figure out a way to replace his teeth with LED lights
Patience is what I have when there are too many witnesses.
For all we know, half the birds are telling the other birds to shut up.
If you`re confident enough, every zoo is a petting zoo.
Some days the problem is I care too much… Today was not one of those days…
Irony. The opposite of wrinkly.
in wine there is wisdom. in beer there is freedom. in water there is... umm bacteria
They say children are a gift from god. I`m totally wide-open to regifting.