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My girlfriend called me up and said "Come on over to my place. No one`s home!" I went over. No one was home.
Just tried to pay for my McDonalds with a hug, it didn`t work. Don`t believe the rumors.
If I’ve offended you, please accept my apology. Then smack yourself in the face for getting offended by something on the Internet.
Today I will kick a$$, and make dreams happen...but first, Coffee.
i think lady gaga puts glue on herself, and rolls around random items.
What did the Japanese man say to the other Japanese man? Something in Japanese,
That annoying feeling when you finally downloaded the movie you wanted to watch and BOOM!... It`s in French. #F**kYouFrance
Oh well, this time isn`t going to procrastinate itself.
It`s just a matter of time before they add the word "Syndrome" after my last name.
If every porkshop was perfect, we wouldn`t have hot dogs.
I want to be rich enough to realize that I can’t buy happiness.
There`s really no telling how successful I could have been if the internet hadn`t been invented...
i got a dig bick..........how many read that wrong
Do angry people know about naps?
I`ll be busy tonight taking my girlfriend out to dinner and then having sex all night. Is what I`d be saying if I had money ... or a girlfriend