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Never seen anyone jogging and smiling, so that’s all I need to know about that.
One time I asked some girl what she was thinking. By the time she finished her thought we had 2 children.
If cats had wings, they would still just lay there.
I am one of those people who presses every button in the elevator when I`m getting out =]
My ex girlfriend had a really weird fetish. She used to dress up as herself and then act like a f*cking b!tch all the time.
I think I`m approaching my "best if used by" date
My hobbies include trying to close the elevator door before someone else gets on.
Called AA by mistake. Those drunks can`t change a tire for sh*t.
is in his own little world but itΒ΄s okay they know me here.
People who describe things as "better than sex" are obviously having the wrong kind of sex.
Rejected Olympic Events: Javelin Catch... Jello Shotput... Border Fencing... Cardboard Boxing... Menstrual Cycling... Salad Tossing... Wrestling Demons...
Finding a date on the internet is so much easier than real life because how are they supposed to know that`s not your Ferrari?
People say laughter is the best medicine, but I’d like to think a beer is the way to go.
Would the 2 Sonic dudes just get it over with and kiss already
College is the only time in which being poor and drunk is acceptable.