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BEST PICK UP LINE: You would probably sleep better tonight if we had sex.
I`m terribly sorry but I have decided not to grow up and act my age after all. So there.
I take a large amount of pride in always being prepared for a nap.
How long does it usually take for a Happy Meal to start working?.... It`s been an hour.
Unless its inappropriately, don`t f*cking touch me.
Give a man a gun he can rob a bank. Give a man a bank and he can rob everybody
I DON`T NEED ANYONE OR ANYTHING!!! (Except for Louie...the name I`ve given this meatball sub.)
I am finally old enough to realize my father was right, but now my kids think I am wrong.
Why even ask how my weekend was if you’re just going to interrupt me halfway through to say “Yeah, I saw your Facebook post.”
Serving size ?? LMAO
The older I get the earlier it gets late.
Ummm,, Can we just admit we may have taken this anybody can grow up to be President thing a bit too far.
This is not meant for you. Look away. STOP LOOKING AT IT! :)
If you still can read this, please inform me ASAP because I have probably blocked the wrong person!
Exercise can add years to your life. For example, I just ran 2 miles and I now feel like I`m 82.