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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

whats the difference between a dog and a fox????? six shots
Was sitting, doing nothing. Then I realized I could be sitting and doing nothing on Facebook. So here I am.
I`ve heard of women that aren`t crazy ... but I`ve also heard of unicorns, so whatever...
My wife wants to have more kids but I don`t want to have to learn anyone else`s name.
Things people say after watching a movie: 5% - I can’t wait for the sequel. 5% - That was a great movie. 5% - That was a complete waste of money. 85% - I gotta pee!!
50 notifications later I regret ever commenting on your status.
I love how twix come with two bars so I can eat one now and the other immediately after
When something goes wrong in your life, just yell "PLOT TWIST!" and move on.
my mom and I have so much in common..she doesn`t listen and niether do I :p
This beer sure tastes like I`m on vacation next week!
At night I dump massive amounts of Legos on the floor in case anyone tries to rob my house bare footed.
Have you ever listened to somebody speak and wonder who ties their shoelaces for them?
If you`re in WalMart and you`re holding in a fart, just remember, YOU`RE IN WALMART!!
I`m sleeping in tell Friday so ... Happy Tuesday.
If I was antisocial I wouldn`t have just ordered a pizza over the phone.