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i want a cute boy to let me hold his hand and his credit card
Was the little pig who decided to built his house out of straw some sort of f***ing idiot?
If I ignored you any harder, we`d be married.
Getting out of bed feels like the worst thing that’s ever happened to me ... every time it happens.
In-laws the reason why I`d never get married..
I don`t care about your choice in politics, religion, or taste in music... I judge you simply based on football team preference
The color 9 is my favorite letter.
I really want to see you tonight. So could you please leave the blinds up and the curtains open?
Marriage is a wonderful institution... but who wants to live in an institution?
If history repeats itself then I am SO getting a dinosaur.
I rather be a known drunk, than an Anonimous Alcoholic
Don`t be that guy that goes around saying "Don`t Be That Guy."
People hiking with a giant stick never seem any better at hiking than the rest of us.
Why the hell isn`t the iphone`s battery life called "Apple Juice."
Good thing I got a college degree I think as I put away the kid toys for the 49 billionth time