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Thanks to whoever made electrical outlets look like tiny screaming faces trapped inside my walls I can`t make eye contact.
WARNING. Content on my Facebook page may offend. But I don`t f*cking care
At what point in potty training do you give the child a toy smartphone?
Just used the "f word" over on FB so I`m waiting for the villagers with their torches, axes, whatever those people use.
people live & people die, but in the the end we still get high.. so if in life you dont succeed, F*CK it All & smoke some WEED ?
I really hate it when people need constant re-assurance. You know what I mean?
The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
You are the reason why I bite the heads off teddy grams.
Do you like me? Breathe for yes, lick your elbow for no.
Apparently, I just ate 39 servings of Tic - Tacs.
I`ll never join one of those dating sites. I prefer to meet someone the old fashioned way. By alcohol & bad decisions.
When I rule the world, it will be illegal to have an opinion until you`ve proven that you are not an idiot.
Dear whoever ate my fries while I was in the ball pit at McDonalds... Not funny, grow up.
If zombies attack the world, everyone will run and hide. Except for us gamers, of course. We`ve been waiting for this all our lives!
Microsoft Excel has got to be the worlds worst video game.