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A sure fire way to lose an afternoon, is to help a friend out when he says "come on it will only take a half hour to fix"
If other employees are taking four fifteen minutes smoke breaks a day, I should most certainly be allowed a one hour nap time.
I figured out the chemical composition of Holy Water. It`s H2OMG
I hate girls who insert the phrase "my boyfriend" into every conversation. So does my boyfriend.
Dating would be a lot easier if the opposite sex had a tail. That way, I could see if it was wagging or not after I did or said something.
I saw a woman crying as she was buying tampons earlier.....must be going through a tough period in her life....
The guest of honour was a bit subdued. The Keyboardist was playing too softly for my liking. But it was a good turnout, lots of food and laughter. But break out into one choreographed `Thriller` dance routine and the crowd goes all apesh!t and tosses you out of the funeral home.
I remember when the internet was two tin cans and a string.
Iām not sure why, but to me Cheerios sound like the happiest of all circular shaped cereals.
This is my first status of 2017. Yeah, I thought it would be better too.
TRUE FRIENDSHIP: Walking into a persons house and your wifi connects automatically.
Whenever you`re feeling down and in the dumps, just remember...the rest of us have been feeling that way about you too!
You`re the type of person who didn`t rewind the Blockbuster VHS...
Hello? HP? Iād like to make a return. I ordered a Laser Jet but you sent me a printer.
I try not to limit my madness to March.