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I don`t know what everyone`s complaining about. The economy looks great from my parents` basement.
I`m actually a really good driver, when Facebook is down.
My method of going "offline" in FB chat is to simply ignore you.
I hate people that don’t know the difference between “your” and “you’re”. Their so stupid…….
I`m not lazy I just really enjoy doing nothing!!
My friend sent his wedding invitation from Facebook Event. I sent him a gift from Farmville.
No way the guy from Operation is insured for any of those ridiculous medical procedures.
New College Admissions Test ______ not getting into this college: A. Your B. Ur C. You`re D. U`re
Using my invisible hula hoop really freaks people out.
Why is this dude chatting with Jake from State Farm at three in the morning anyhow?
I dreamt that was dreaming, and then someone woke me up and told me I was dreaming but it turned out I had only dreamed that so I went back to sleep in my dream, all upset that my dream that I was dreaming was interrupted by another dream....hahahahaha.....whoa, need to lay off the Red Bull.
Shake up a random soda pop in the company fridge today. You deserve it.
My coworkers will stand around confused during a fire drill but the office turns into the Hunger Games when there`s lunch brought in for everyone
OK. So I took the road less traveled. Now where the hell am I?
It was so cold out today i actually saw a few gangsters with their pants pulled up.