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According to a recent study 52% of women have used vibrators....I`m guessing the other 48% have new ones?
Let me get this straight…a woman could pour hot wax on her legs, ripping all the hair out…and still be afraid of a spider?
Had a blast doing my Black Friday tradition!!!! I slept!
My wife asked me if I knew her favorite flower was. Apparently "Gold Medal All Purpose" was not the correct response
I slammed the car door on my fingers this afternoon. In related news, there`s an 83% chance that my nephew just added "Mother*ucker" to his vocabulary.
If a bra is called an `Over the shoulder bolder holder,` then would you call men`s underwear `Under the butt nut hut?`
I love facebook... It`s the only place where I can talk to a wall and not look like an idiot...
Respect your elders. They made it through school without Google and Wikipedia.
Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.
You know it’s cold outside when you go outside and it’s cold.
I`m jealous of my parents, I`ll never have kids as cool as theirs.
Having a dirty mind makes simple conversation much more exciting!
If your girlfriend has $15 and you have $30, your girlfriend actually has $45.
Suddenly my prison fantasy football league just got real.
Sometimes I drive between lanes and pretend my car is Pacman gobbling up the dashed lines.