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I wonder if "Sober Me" knows that "Drunk Me" can Breakdance?
is actually feeling pretty much okay about not accomplishing anything this year.
I often wonder how things worked out for that guy who grabbed the bull by the horns.
If I have offended you, hurt you, belittled you in any manner, then I want you to know that I was only just getting started.
Friends are like snowflakes.... if you pee on them they disappear.
Everyone has that one friend that can turn any conversation into something dirty....I am usually that friend.
You`ve never been truly drunk until you`ve had to use a barstool as a walker to get home.
Doing absolutely nothing on the weekends has started to feel more fun than actually going out.
OK I`ve stumbled out of bed and made it to the computer- and another Facebook day begins!
My door bell is a recording of a shotgun being racked.
That`s disgusting! (unless you`re up for it?)
If you loose a tooth as an adult, the tooth fairy gives you a trailer.
Never marry a tennis player " love means nothing to them "
It`s 2013. With all the hormones in food and advances in medical technology, why are there still girls with less than C cup boobs?
U have 10 fish, 5 drown, 3 come back to life. how many fish do you have?? stop counting smart one fish can`t drown