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There’s a wild side to EVERY innocent face.
Just once I`d like to yell, "Don`t you know who I am?!" because I`m important, not because I`m drunk and actually forgot.
Ladies, when it comes to stalking, I`m 100% behind you.
I can only please one person a day...and today is not your day!
The good thing about "poking" on Facebook, no babies are created.
As a nation, we may be spending our children`s money, but at my house, it`s the other way around.
When you turn 21, you can legally do all the things you`ve been doing since you were 15.
Cubs fans, you need to wait 107 more years. But don`t worry, 2124 will be here before you know it!
Opinions are like a$$holes: some people make money by posting them on the internet.
I wish I could forget you as easy as I forget my passwords.
Just dropped off some film to be processed. More on this story as it develops.
Today feels like a stay in bed, pull the blankets over your head, and pretend you`re on an adventure in a kangaroo`s pouch type of day
The real heroes are the people who live within driving distance of their in-laws.
Whenever I see people lined up outside a club on Friday night, I just think "look at all these poor people who don`t know Netflix exists."
If you would`ve told me back in 1999 that we`d still be using animated gifs in 2015, I would`ve said "Wow, what a boring conversation"