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*Financial Status* Just rinsed off a paper plate...
The amount of times I`ve had to say no to the Adobe Updater has totally prepared me to be a parent.
Happy President`s day all. Heading out to buy a new mattress.
Ever wonder if the McDonalds logo is the letter "m" or just an image of your butt cheeks it will cause?
I hope Karma smacks some people before I do.
Give a man a gun he can rob a bank. Give a man a bank and he can rob everybody
Ever get out of the shower and not remember getting a towel ready but its there anyway? You`re welcome.
Hey people who buy bottled water for their dogs, can I have some money?
I just read that burglars use Facebook to see when people aren’t home. So from now on, I’m at home. With a rifle. And a hungry crocodile.
Why do single women take dating advice from other single women? That`s like Stevie Wonder giving driving directions to Ray Charles.
It usually only takes about five minutes into any conversation I’m having before people start shaking their head and quoting the bible.
I really don`t know what the big deal is about Black Friday. I black out every Friday....
I don`t know why it`s necessary to get a glass dirty, when wine tastes perfectly fine straight out of the bottle.
Not all men cheat. Some of you women just assume you’re in a relationship with the guy.
I’m jealous of a book character for having sex with another character but sure come ask my advice about your marriage.