Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Me, watching the Olympics: "That was impressive." Announcer: "ANOTHER DISASTROUS MISTAKE!"
+ if you wish you could record your dreams.
Please do not read this.
Bitch I’m not insulting you, I’m describing you.
Barbie has an awful lot of things for a girl who`s knees don`t bend.
If I could have dinner with anyone, alive or dead, there is no question. I would want them to be alive.
I’m a lonely Status. I wish more people liked me.
Scientist Proved That There are more Than 124786534688644478 People Living In This world who are Too Lazy To Read The Above Number...!!!
Anyone want to be fake engaged for two hours so we can eat cake samples?
I`m too lazy to ever write a biography. Story of my life.
Zoning out is your brain’s way of saying “You look bored. Let me take you to a better place.”
Sorry I mispronounced your baby`s name you made up.
My chemistry teacher asked us what the heaviest metal was today. Apparently "Megadeath" was the wrong answer.
"My place is a mess" - Every girl, ever.... "Well in that case, I`m not coming in" - No guy, ever.
I have an inferiority complex,,,,,, but it isn`t a very good one.