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I donate blood 5 times a year just so I`m less and less related to some of my relatives.
Today would be a great day to leave a note on a random car that says "I know what you did".
Match dot com, but for socks.
Movies are so unrealistic. This guy`s using his computer to access an alien ship & not once has it asked if he wants to upgrade his Adobe.
So you think you can study with your facebook activated? That`s cute! ^.^
If one of Santa`s helpers takes a picture of himself with his smartphone, is that an "elfie"?
You can`t make me believe there`s a shortage of jobs in this country when there are 23 cash registers at WalMart and only 3 cashiers.
Have you ever had a fly or small bug land on your computer screen and your first reaction is to try and scare it with the cursor?
Bipolar smile :(: ...... Gets um everytime !
Best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest they are too old for it.
My plan for today? Same as always: Drink coffee and be sexy.
It doesn’t matter how many signs I put up around the office, HR said high five a co-worker in the face with a shovel day isn’t a thing.
You’ve never truly lived until someone has posted a sign because of something you’ve done.
I knew she was about to say something intelligent because she began with, "You once told me..."
I`m hungry, but I`m not `cook something` hungry.