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Invite me to your wedding . Invite me to go have fun , but please stop inviting me to your farm .
Is it wrong to tell a knock knock joke to a homeless person ?
Your car took up two spaces, I tried to move it over with my key.
Back in my day, we didn’t have computers or the internet. Everyone had to walk uphill for days to tell me I’m an a$$hole.
You took the time to make your minivan look like a reindeer, but you can`t take one second to hit the turn signal an inch from your fingers?
Judging from the bar receipts, ATM withdraws, hand stamps, and the glitter in my car, I now realize I`m a ball of fun when I black out.
why waste your brain cells to think of a comment when you can just like someone else`s?
Etc... A word used to make others believe that you know more than you actually do
If you love someone, let them go, if they don`t come back..... Set them on fire *evil grin*
I`m afraid if I start working out, I`ll be too sexy
Is the "D" in Donkey Kong a typo? It should have been Monkey Kong right? These are the things that keep me up at night.
New marital Status update : Taken, but only for GRANTED
RIP to my hair dryer. It was the only thing to blow me for the last 10 years and never complain.
Don`t feel bad if you don`t enjoy my posts. The important thing to remember is that I do. I enjoy all of them. That`s what matters.
If you’re telling me to relax, it’s probably your fault that I’m not.