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If I won the lottery, I don`t think I would change much. I`d still be the same asshole, just one in a helicopter.
what does bgif mean on a friday night ? ... boobs go in front
A telephone survey says that 51 percent of college students drink until they pass out at least once a month. The other 49 percent didn`t answer the phone.
I never got the expression "complete idiot". Is there an Incomplete version?
The Great Wall of China has brought more foreigners than it has kept out.
You don`t look like 200 likes in person
The "best part of waking up" doesn`t even make sense.
What a lovely winter we`re having this spring.
I slept on the sofa last night which is weird because I`m not even married.
I laughed more at the Broncos offense then I did at the commercials.
I don`t need drugs to have a good time, I need them to focus, avoid depression, endure winter, fall asleep, and controll my high blood pressure
What does it mean when you sit next to an elderly woman on the bus and she shakes her head and makes the sign of the cross?
Just started a new exercise program where I put on a gorilla mask and chase a random toddler through Costco.
Its almost that time again! That`s right, its holiday season! Merry Black Friday sales, and happy spending!
You can get away with farting at the zoo because you can always blame the animals...