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A good office manager never let`s you run out of ink, paper or vodka
I`m sick to death of these letters from the City of College Station bullying me to mow my grass! If Walmat can prepare for Christmas 3 mths in advance why can`t I do the same for Easter!!!??
Just googled "who gives a sh!t?" My name wasn`t in the search results.
Did the Baha Men ever find their dogs? Did they put up posters or just sing that song?
How come there`s never enough dirt to refill the hole even after you`ve put the body in? Asking for a friend
I`ll make better mistakes tomorrow.
why would i ever pay to go to a nascar event when i could get drunk beside the interstate and cheer for cars for free
Chess says everything about men and women. The King has to take things one step at a time, while the Queen can do whatever the hell she wants.
A word to the wise ain`t necessary - it`s the stupid ones that need the advice!
Nintendo should handle education, I don’t remember half the crap from high school but I know all of Super Mario World’s secrets.
My original account got suspended for aggressive behavior and they haven`t even seen me in bed yet.
Karma may "work" but I think that bitch takes a lot of days off
I`m sure the guy standing at the urinal next to me, regrets wearing those flip flops today.
Whenever I start feeling spontaneous, my bank account quietly reminds me to calm the f*ck down. -Bfanch
Instead of LOL, try SALTS ( smiled a little, then stopped)