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I don`t have an inner child. I have an inner old person who wants everyone to shut up.
I would rather have a bad day of fishing then a good day of work.
My wife complained that I never lifted a finger to help around the house. So I lifted a finger. Apparently, it was the wrong one.
When suffering from insomnia I either count sheep or ask my GF how her day was.
The only way I know if I’ve bought enough beer is if my car thinks I have a passenger.
I don`t really care who wins the elections as long as everyone had fun out there.
Flies only live for 24 hours.. Except for the ones that get in your room. Those bastards live forever.
May be time to get in shape. Halfway up this flight of stairs and I`m considering setting up base camp and trying again in the morning.
Relationships are like yard sales. They look good from a distance, but once you get there it`s just a bunch of sh!t you don`t really need.
It`s so expensive being a woman. I know because I have financed a few.
At the Touch of Love..Everyone Becomes a Poet !
But..At the Touch of Breakup Everyone Becomes a Philosopher... ^_^
My wife complains about everything I do. It`s like she doesn`t know there are "Sexy singles in my area" that want to meet with me.
If only my goals were to be poor, lazy and out of shape.
You can tell how much a woman hates her husband by how short she cuts her hair.
They say children are a gift from god. I`m totally wide-open to regifting.