Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Alcohol: Because no great story ever started with someone eating salad.
Stovetop Directions: 1.) Use microwave.
The block button is just the adult version of sticking your fingers in your ears and repeating "I can`t hear you" over and over
With the right person, you can talk about absolutely nothing for hours & feel like you spoke about everything.
I wonder if people without dogs actually pick food off the floor?
What’s the point of making people like Paul McCartney and Elton John knights if they’re not going to joust?
What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ”K” instead of ”OK”?
You`d be surprised at how many times I`ve gone home, when i hear someone tell me "Go hard or Go home".
Admit it, you have that one voice that you only use on animals and babies.
There`s always cake to celebrate happy moments, but I really think cake would do better during the bad times. Got fired? Have a cake.
Hand dryers are a great way to see how your hands look while skydiving.
I wish I was a jedi, but mostly just so I didn`t have to bend over to pick up dog poop.
Just seen this girl walk into a lamp post! I could have stopped her but that wouldn`t have been funny would it
In the interest of improving the workplace, my company has put up signs that say: CAUTION. OPEN DOORS SLOWLY ... My best time so far is 7 min.
Family and Friends - I am FAR too busy to listen to any of your problems or concerns *Googles do penguins go to heaven?*