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Dear children, when you look under your bed, what exactly are you planning to do when you find me? Sincerely, The Monster.
Congratulations! You’ve just read this sentence.
You know your ugly when the dog has to close his eyes to hump your leg
I`m starting to think that the Facebook status update I liked has had absolutely no influence on Government policy at all.
Valentines day
Just checked my Farmville for the first time in 2 years... It`s now a Walmart.
There is no better sunscreen than sitting inside a bar.
Guns don`t kill people. Fathers with pretty daughters do.
Getting drunk and listening to loud music solves 87% of all life`s problems
Last person to like this wins a prize.
Is bloodletting still in use today? Just thinking...I know a couple of people here that may be in need of some bloodletting
My wife just bought a $50 bottle of shampoo. So guys, party at my house this weekend because apparently we won the Lottery!!!
Thank God I finally found love! Its on Page 126 in the dictionary.
I wouldn`t do much for a Klondike Bar; I would however get naked for beer.
Square box. Round pizza. Triangle slices. I`m Confused.