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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Fun Fact: A pizza will never sleep with your best friend behind your back.
Anything worth taking seriously is worth making fun of.
life is like a bed of roses just got to whatch out for the pricks
Did you hear about the Cannibal that "passed" his Uncle in the Jungle?...............
Ironically the only way I`d watch the 50 Shades of Grey movie is if you tied me to a chair and forced me to.
I don’t write children’s books because the last page would always say: "Now shut up and go to sleep."
My mother said, β€œYou won’t amount to anything because you procrastinate.” I said, β€œOh ya…..Just you wait.....”
Let`s be honest. If God wanted us to be vegetarians, he would have made cows faster.
When you`re a kid, you hate those moments when there is absolutely nothing to do. As an adult, you live for them.
Confucius would have been great at Status Updates......
I was filling out this form when one of the questions asked "What level is your maturity?" I didn`t fill it out cause I couldn`t find my crayons!!
If we sneezed Windex instead of spit I bet my neighbors would be cool with me standing at their window.
Question everything...Or should you?
insert coin to view my status
has a Massive drinking problem ... there is no alcohol in the house!