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All I`m saying is, China could have a much better relationship with the West if they shared their dragons with us. But, whatever, be that way.
Do handjobs from girls who speak sign language count as blowjobs
Bumper stickers are helpful for recognizing members of society you do not want to associate with.
If you like to make love while listening to music, always choose a live album. ..That way you`ll get an applause every 3 to 4 minutes. :)
Unless you fell off the stairmaster and a barbell fell on your face... no one wants to hear about your workout.
I would lose weight, but I hate losing..
I don`t even think it`s possible for a bear to cook porridge.
Is Nudeism a religion?
The lady next to me in the elevator told me to press One. That was the last thing I remembered
Girlfriend: No, you hang up... Me: (click)
Took the ice from my ice bucket challenge and put it in my whisky.
I got food poisoning today. I don`t know when I`ll use it though.
I love watching women`s beach volleyball. There have been two wrist injuries so far, but I should be ok by next week.
Calling your girlfriend beautiful because you forgot her name.
My family tree is a cactus, we`re all pricks.