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Pretty fed up with the fact that pandemonium almost NEVER involves pandas.
I`ve been told my posts are too depressing but what does it matter. We`ll all be dead soon anyway.
Every time you get dressed remember that, if you die, that`s your ghost outfit forever.
Sometimes I get so mad at myself for being too lazy that I don`t even do anything about it.
If you think about it,, Batman was pretty lazy about naming all his stuff.
Still no news on the royal baby. One will assume its being delivered by Royal Mail
How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word? Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!
Only a few years ago, the average parents had four children. Nowadays, the average child has four parents.
I have a million dollar idea that I will share with the first million people to send me a dollar.......
I woke up praying McDonald`s would still be serving breakfast but I just missed it by 6 hours.
Sitting in traffic like the non-helicopter owning loser that I am.
I just put Santa hats on all my Halloween decorations.
Bands who can`t afford a smoke machine should hire my girlfriend to cook at their concert
Iam not as THINK as you DRUNK iam!!
For our next trick, we should hack into North Korea`s TV system and put Jersey Shore on repeat...