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If my computer desktop were an actual place, they would bring in blindfolded people to make a Febreeze commercial.
Has anyone EVER checked to see how the room or wall behind them looks before taking and posting 50 selfies?!
Thinking about moving to Alabama just so I don’t have to scroll through all those other states when I sign up for websites.
Reminiscing isn’t as fun as it used to be.
Do you know what’d look good on you? Me
To the makers of rice cakes; thanks for nothing!
IMPORTANT REMINDER: Sunday is Mother`s Day, which means Facebook is gonna be annoying as crap...
I never met a teenager driving a luxury car that I didn’t hate.
Man I wanna throw a book at someones face and be like "I Facebooked you!"
Adding “and sh!t” at the end of a sentence can make anything sound thug. Example: “I was playing with my bubbles and sh!t.”
Would an obsession with the imperial measurement system be considered a foot fetish?
My relationship is like an iPhone, I don`t have an iPhone.
Have you ever listened to somebody speak and wonder who ties their shoelaces for them?
Got kicked out of the casino again. Apparently, gold chocolate coins mess up their slot machines or something.
"That girl is totally checking you out" said vodka. -Bfanch