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If you make something easier for yourself they call you lazy. If you make something easier for everyone else they call you a genius.
I hit a new low today and used a cheat code on Wii Fit
Let´s drink tequila till you don´t remember what I suggest next..
Have you noticed that it`s only the married squirrels that hurl themselves in front of your car......
I read an article the other day that said, "if you drink every day you are an alcoholic." Thank god I only drink every night
Please don`t post that political joke you just came up with. . . it really wasn`t that funny to begin with. Thanks for understanding. -the rest of us
I did not trip...the floor looked like it needed a hug.
Sir, your burrito is $5.97. With guacamole, your total comes to $386,932.32
If I agreed with you we´d both be wrong.
If a man says you’re ugly he’s being mean. If a woman says you’re ugly she’s envious. If a little kid says you’re ugly, you’re ugly.
Make your girlfriend scream your name, leave the toilet seat up.
Relationship status: Private. The only way for it to be.
I`m more indecisive than a John in a brothel with gold credit card.
thjeo oskl asopa joa sajksla wioj apska shul bhcgy ....Yes I just wasted your time ;)
My favorite thing to do on Facebook is to get in a long conversation with someone and then delete all my comments so they look crazy.