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Ladys, if you`re in an argument with a guy and there`s no may to win. Start playing with your boobs...works every time.
If I had a time machine, I would just keep going back to bed.
It`s Friday the 13th. Good thing I`m not superstitious, it`s unlucky to be superstitious...
Girls who don`t get naked when you`re drunk.. Explain yourselves.
I don’t know what it is but, it’s on sale.
Yet another advantage of being single. All I bring to Thanksgiving is empty Tupperware...
Applebees is a word that starts off pretty tame but takes a dangerous twist
When blondes have more fun do they know it?
Tonight I’m going to have my favorite drink. It’s called “a lot.”
They should just block cell phone service in movie theaters. Problem solved.
The awkward moment when you realise you’re wrong in an argument, but you keep arguing anyway.
My Facebook movie is already in the dollar bin at Walmart.
Robots can do anything we set their mind to
So you have 820 friends on Facebook and yet no one was around to take your picture when you decided to use the mirror for a good shot?
If life is a Bitch, then why hasn´t it made me a Sandwich