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Better pound all these beers so I can get the bottles in the bin for recycling day.
What if pay-phones are disappearing so they can keep us in the matrix?
The only time I`ve ever had a chip on my shoulder was when I tried to dump the entire bag into my mouth at once.
I hope the next big trend in music is Talent.
If there is one-thing in this would i don`t like being thought is ... a lesson.
In actuality, Batman is just a more violent and dark version of Inspector Gadget.
This Coffee has given me unrealistic expectations of productivity.
my ex-girlfriend is a famous porn star. But would she be pissed if she found out.
I hate bugs that fly, jump, crawl, dougie, twerk, 2 step, all that crap.
It was so cold that when we milk the cows we got ice cream.
I am finally old enough to realize my father was right, but now my kids think I am wrong.
Why would I dance like nobody`s watching? People need to see this.
I just googled "Is there really cowbell in the actual song Don`t Fear the Reaper?" and my first response was, "Go outside and do something."
The one thing you can always count on is your fingers.
I sometimes get road rage just pushing a shopping cart though a grocery store!