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whats the difference between a dog and a fox????? six shots
St. Patricks day is the only time you can ask somebody in public,"Do you want some green" without you looking suspect.
I wanna see Mythbusters do the bible.
All women want is to have a relationship with an intelligent man. The only problem is, intelligent men don’t get into relationships.
Great idea for an April Fools Prank ... Hide all of the desktop icons on someone`s computer and replace their wallpaper with a screenshot of their old desktop.
I am going to write a book about A.D.D., because .. I love fishing. -LOL
Roses are red! violets are buckets. This poem makes no sense. Snot.
I`m dreaming of a white Christmas. But if the white runs out I`ll pop open the red and drink that.
That disappointing moment when you pull up to work and it`s not fully engulfed in fire.
I would rather cuddle then have sex. If you`re good with grammar you`ll get it.
I have many talents... For example: Sleeping.
Sorry a remote fell out when you took off my bra
what do you mean booze ain`t food!?
I find it quite ironic that the most dangerous thing about weed is getting caught with it.
It’s a holiday. You know what that means… Ten million status updates saying the exact same thing. Get ready.