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I`m actually a really good driver, when Facebook is down.
No I don`t think you`re stupid, I just think you have real bad luck when it comes to thinking
My car said "low on fuel"..I replied "low on cash"..I`m still waiting for a reply..
I just don`t have enough middle fingers for today.
Folding laundry with a toddler is like trying to straighten a desk full of papers while a fan blows on it.
People who say watching golf on TV is boring have obviously never listened to golf on the radio
The early bird gets the worm. But the rest of the birds can get McGriddles until 10:30.
If one teacher cannot teach every subject, then how come one student is expected to learn all the subjects.
Another funny thing about this status is when you finally realize that it talks about nothing? its all ready too late to stop reading. lol
I don’t think I get enough credit for doing everything I do while being unmedicated.
Pokémon means a totally different thing if you`re stuck in prison.
I really don`t get Astrology but I just hope my daughter stays a Virgo until she`s at least 18.
The greatest fear is NOT fear itself. It’s dropping your phone in a port-a-potty!
I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey but i turned myself around and THAT`S what it`s all about
I spend my weekends farting in libraries and then shushing people that complain.