Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
"I`m on my way." -People who haven`t even left the house yet.
Funniest thing ever heard on TV. "Ward, you were a little hard on the Beaver last night"
“Delete, Block, Ignore” Its too bad getting rid of people in life is not as easy as it is on Facebook..
Law and Order is just Blue`s Clues for adults.
Having a mohawk used to mean you were tough. Now it means you’re a 3 year-old with annoying parents.
When grown-ups tell kids they have a lot of energy, they really mean that they’re being annoying little bastards.
No one ever reads the rules of Monopoly unless an argument breaks out.
I`m ready to regret having sex with you.
You can save a lot of money by walking face-first into a spiderweb every morning instead of buying coffee.
Would you like to save money on your car insurance? Walk ... Just sayin
Do me a favor if someone tells you they don`t like me , tell them I don`t like them either.
for every like, I will fart on my wife face
You`re pretty cocky for someone with such a small ... vocabulary.
Shouting "Not it!" should still make us exempt from doing anything that we don`t feel like doing.
Sometimes saying "F*ck it" is the best decision.