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United States is where moms get a day and shark get a whole week.
I`m not as smart as I used to be but then again you can`t stay a teenager all of your life.
If I agree with you, we would both be wrong.
So another day has come and gone and I still haven`t used algebra
Like a stoned man once said, I can`t remember.
Do not keep all your work for tomorrow, always remember you can also do it the day after tomorrow.. Be lazy, Think crazy.
I can`t go to sleep if any of my apps need to be updated, but will drive my car with the check engine light until it explodes
My mother said, "You won`t amount to anything because you procrastinate." I said, "Oh ya.....Just you wait."
I eat my Chinese food just like any other American, with chopsticks, one grain of rice at a time.
Even if gas prices go down, I´m still going to siphon gas from my neighbor´s car because I like the adrenaline rush and he´s an a$$hole
Did you know , that if you use asterisk , you can do anything you want ? * gets on a t-rex and gallops away into the sunset *
My new diet is not buying things at the store that make the cashier say wow someone`s having a party
We all just sat there and watched as Pepe Le Pew tried to rape that cat. Shame on us.
I carry a knife, but it`s just in case of cake.
You have to stay in shape. My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She`s 97 today and we don`t know where the hell she is.