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I don`t know what everyone`s complaining about. The economy looks great from my parents` basement.
3yo just yelled "face-five!" & slapped his brother in the face. I`m totally using that at work tomorrow.
in 2014 there were times when I annoyed you, disturbed you, irritated you and bugged the hell out of you. Today i wanna let you know that i planned to continue with it this year :-)
Yes I am a bad boy ... But your the one that`s going to get spanked.
So I met an Egyptian, they walk just like us.
I`m starting to get that "f*ck it" attitude about everything..
I started to compliment my neighbors on their new wallpaper but then I realized they can`t hear me through binoculars.
I hear lots of doctors are prescribing medical marijuana for arthritis. Given that arthritis is "inflammation of the joints", it`s fighting fire with fire!
Some people are like eye-candy... I`m more like eye-meatloaf.
Life is tough. Put on your big girl panties and deal with it like the rest of us.
If it`s tourist season why can`t we shoot them?
I just wanted to send you a quick note letting you know that you`re in my inappropriate thoughts.
if it has tits or tires sooner or later it will give you problems.
There is a gym called Anytime Fitness. I choose 2030.
I’m a fan of saying YOU’RE WELCOME really loudly when people don’t thank you.