Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
When I was young I dreamed of saving the world, now I just dream of making through each month.
If you think this status is funny someone you hate will step on a lego.
"No comment" - said no woman, ever
You know you`re up really late at night when you turn on ESPN and 2 white guys are boxing!
My math is never so quick or exact as when I see an old flame with a child.
I got in touch with my feminine side today... I made myself a sandwich.
I love secretly placing a deck of cards on top of someones ceiling fan.
My mission is to be the first person on Facbook to have one million people on their block list. . .
So this guy pointing a gun to my face was like: Your money or your life! and I was like: I`m on Facebook, I don`t have money or a life.
Threw my back out today reaching for the shampoo in the shower. But I`ll be telling everyone it`s from having sex while skydiving.
I`m ready to regret having sex with you.
When I was a kid, my parents told me I could be anyone I wanted to be. Turns out, this is called "Identity Theft".
My package finally came today. this is awesome....it means I have bubble wrap to play with
Perfect girls are found at every corner of the earth... unfortunately, the earth is round.
Tieam... problem solved