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I enjoy long walks on the beach and that thing you just did with that banana.
Thanks to everyone for the Birthday wishes! To anyone who missed it.”No cake for you!!"
I`m sticking to my guns ... I really should have washed my hands after I ate.
"Don`t make me regret this." -things I think when accepting a friend request.
Wow! it`s late.. I need to hit the sack........ Then go to bed.
I applied for a government job today and accidentally sent the wrong resume. This early display of incompetence should work in my favor.
is admitting to pushing Humpty Dumpty, he had it coming!!
"Ramen". - Scooby Doo, finishing a prayer
After four centuries, the semicolon has finally achieved it`s true calling: helping people wink online.
My mission is to be the first person on Facbook to have one million people on their block list. . .
Sobriety and I have agreed to see other people today
Due to an unforeseen error during last night`s love making session I am forced to wear non matching socks today
They say a dog can retrieve a tennis ball from over a mile away. Seems a bit far fetched to me.
Pizza is like sex, when it is good it`s very good, When it`s bad...it`s still pretty good.
Living alone is pretty cool, I don`t even know if my bathroom door closes