Daily Silly Status

I want to meet myself from someone else’s point of view.

I bet Miley Cyrus is eating Twerky right now.

Money may not buy you happiness, but it does buy you all the sh1t you want!

I`m a good singer. Unfortunately I have a bad voice.

Whenever I read: "Do not exceed recommended dose" I always think, "Challenge accepted!"

I don`t like people who can`t make fun of themselves. It means more work for me.

I bought a box of "SO CALLED" Hot Pockets --- brought them home, and opened one to eat it, and the Damned thing was FROZEN ----- Miis-Advertizing at it`s BEST!!! Now what do I do with the Damned thing???? :-P

My doctor is getting really tired of me asking if the stuff I see in commercials is right for me.

People are so ungrateful. No one ever thanks me for having the patience not to kill them.

My dad always used to say, "The sky`s the limit!" Which is probably why he got fired from his job at NASA.

Pretty soon you`ll be able to get married online, instead of saying "I do" you will have to click "I agree to these terms and conditions."

I`m no auto mechanic but I`m pretty good at letting people who drive behind me know whether or not they need new brakes

Might wake up early and go running but I also might win the lottery, the odds are about the same

I just watched Back to the Future Part II and not once did I see a person walking around staring at their smartphone.

Men who claim women belong in the kitchen definitely do not know what to do with them in the bedroom!