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A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
spank me, its the only way i`ll learn.
I don`t get enough credit for not going on killing sprees.
What do they give the person that has everything? antibiotics
Some people come into our lives & leave footprints on our hearts. Others come into our lives & make us wanna leave footprints on their face.
I`m tired of being the better person. One day I`d like to be the bitch that they claim I am.
Never take a Chess enthusiast to a restaurant with checkered tablecloths!β¦β¦Itβll take them an hour to pass the salt!
I always win at chess ... by hitting my opponent with a brick.
Some families are like Snickers Bars. Mostly sweet, with a few nuts!
I drink coffee for your protection.
My favorite exercise is somewhere between a lunge and a crunch. It`s called lunch.
According to my current parking spot I`m a physician.
Any of you had a friend that borrowed your sh!t and kept it for so long you had to borrow it back..
If whores, witches, ghosts and hobo`s show up on my doorstep, I can only assume it`s Halloween because our family reunion was in July....
In the South, they remove the `g` from the end of most words. Just sayin`.