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Do you think they still give out chips in Gambler`s Anonymous?
Do you ever think that if it weren`t for someone smoking Marijuana they might of killed you already. . .
I saw a poor old lady fall over today, at least I presume she was poor, she only had $ 1,20 in her purse
The good thing about being tall is, you can`t get lost in a crowd. The bad thing is, you can`t get lost in a crowd.
Its never polite to ask the guy at the next table "are you done with that?" Especially when he`s breaking up with his girlfriend.
I watch so many crime shows on Tv, that when I turn off the Tv set, I wipe my fingerprints 0ff the remote.
Your just jealous because u don`t hear the voices.
You know it`s way past your bed time when the 1-800-dial-a-hoe commercials come on.
My hobbies include trying to close the elevator door before someone else gets on.
I take so many things with a grain of salt that I`m surprised I don`t have high blood pressure.
Pretending I`m a pleasent person all day is exhausting.
If you had to choose between your significant other and a million dollars, what`s the first thing you`d buy?
Just because nobody complains doesn`t mean all parachutes are perfect.
Would you like a push on that mood swing of yours?
scientific fact: never tell a woman she`s crazy unless you want to see crazy.