Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Spread happiness by smiling at a stranger today...or flash them your boobs. Strangers love boobs!
A Waist Is A Terrible Thing To Mind
Picking and choosing who to say happy birthday to since 2006, thanks Facebook!
One minute without you feels like 60 seconds.
Anyone else ever thought about farting into one of those plastic cylinders at the bank drive-thru?
The right man will love you unconditionally, will be loyal, and will always be happy to see you. ... Oh wait, That`s my dog. My dog does that.
Writing "Omg you guys are still friends after what she said about you???" on every group photo of girls I see on Instagram
Head & Shoulders needs to come out with a body spray that will help repel flakey people from my life.
I`ve grown up a lot recently. For example, I used to drink beer all day and now I drink wine.
How to tell if your wife is mad at you - Step 1. She is
I will be responsible for my actions when my actions become more responsible.
People will believe anything if you whisper it.
Is it weird that I`m 43 years old and have a secret handshake with 3 adults.....and my dog?
“I need to stop,” I whispered as I clicked next episode.
Ugh, I forgot to go to the gym today. That`s 9 years in a row now...