Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I`ve been knocking for ten minutes. Don`t people answer their bathroom windows anymore?
If a girl can kick your a$$ at video games, she’s a keeper.
Why does the alphabet need to be in order anyway
Not all guys just want s@x... I want sandwiches too.
I know you`re supposed to have 3 balanced meals a day, but how many can I have at night?
You don’t have to be naked to have a good time, but it helps.
Oh cool! ... I really do not care.
Drake isn`t even a rapper anymore. He`s an emotion, like "how are you doing today?" "idk im feeling kinda drake though"
You know your a$s is ugly when you`re the one always asked to take the photo.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me "Sir" without adding, "You`re making a scene."
You can tell a man`s age by how close their socks are to their knees.
I’m tired of chasing my dreams, I`m just going to ask them where their going and meet them there later.
When life gives you lemons... all you need is tequila (and salt).
For some reason, I`m an extremely secretive person. Don`t ask me why!
you know you have a kid personality when you think step brothers is the greatest movie ever.