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So I´ve narrowed it down and I´m either gonna start a motorcycle gang or take a nap.
Statistically, 132% of all people exaggerate.
In post apocalyptic movies everyone wears leather ... but there are no cows.
Sometimes I wanna copy someone´s status word for word and see if they notice.
If Apple really want to introduce something new and "innovative" they should just release a longer charger.
I’m not brave. I’m just past the age where running is an option.
about love
If your that person that makes microwave popcorn at work, nobody likes you.
Remember, children. The best way to get a puppy for Christmas is to beg for a baby brother.
There are more important things in life than Facebook and Twitter, like watching TV and having a beer.
The biggest lie I tell myself is: “I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it.”
The restraining order doesn`t mean we can`t hangout. It just says I can`t get within 50 ft of you. So you wanna play catch or frisbee or something?
Fun thing to do #48: Spice up your food delivery order by ending the call with "And NO cops!"
All these years and I still don`t understand why they didn`t put Kevin Bacon in Grease.
I wish all my freckles would just mix into a tan.