Daily Silly Status

As you Mature... you learn that you cannot make someone love you.. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in..

India launched a rocket to Mars yesterday… That’s a heck of a place to put a call center.

Hi I’m a spider & I can make your girlfriend scream louder than you can.

I remember when vodka was just vodka flavored ...

Sometimes I order fajitas at a restaurant just to get more attention.

I`m outdoorsy in that I like getting drunk on patios.

I just saw a woman at Walmart with March Madness teeth ... She was down to the final four.

I do not argue, I explain why I’m right.

They act like technology is ruining childhood, but back in the day, kids were so bored they would turn their eyelids inside out for fun.

Hope you get down and funky on this the day of your birth!!

I don`t appreciate my son`s teacher circling all the wine stains on his homework.

Still waiting on the "Once you go black, you`ll never go back" episode of Mythbusters.

There`s no WE in pizza.

Didn`t have to do much to end my last relationship...she first told me that "opposites attract"...then a couple of days later she told me i was handsome, kind, smart, funny and loving...

The awkward moment when someone deletes their comment on facebook and you look like you’re talking to yourself.