Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Racism, sexism and homophobia make no sense when there are so many perfectly good stupid people to hate.
"The Ugly Duckling" has a great message. Everything in life will work itself out once you become physically attractive.
"I am upping my standards... so up yours!"
Awkward moment when you don’t know if you were offered gum out of generosity or if your breath stinks.
Every so often I’ll listen to my wife talk non stop for hours at a time, to remind myself why people wander into traffic without looking.
Ironically the only way I`d watch the 50 Shades of Grey movie is if you tied me to a chair and forced me to.
Next time you see someone you don`t like, begin conversation with "I see the assassins have failed."
Maybe, just once, someone will call me "Sir" without adding, "You`re making a scene."
You can either agree with me, or you can be wrong.
If your parachute doesn`t deploy don`t worry, you have the rest of your life to fix it.
Internet went down so I had to spend time with my family. They seem like good people.
I don´t know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
So the Boy Scouts are going to let girls join. Teenage boys and girls camping in the woods together. What could possibly go wrong?
Back in my day it was called daydreaming…not ADHD.
People without kids: I`ll never yell at my kids ... People with kids: I DONT KNOW WHY SOMEONE SPIT THEIR GUM ON THE ROAD, JUST WALK!