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As a man, EVERY month is `Breast Awareness Month` for me.
Sorry I stopped listening to your story when it wasn’t about me
I tend to avoid things that make me look fat. You know like scales, mirrors and photographs
I don´t like to think of myself as "Special"... I think I would call me a limited edition.
A drunk man walks into a bar...but enough about me...
Just got a Cheerio stuck between my toes walking through the kitchen. Clearly my dog isn`t doing his part of the chores around here
Fitness nuts have to do an entire marathon to feel a runner`s high..... I just have to bend over and tie my shoes.
I overheard this guy bragging about his fancy hotel sweet. Ptttsht. They are nothing but cheap a$$ mints!
I bet strippers look forward to that feeling of getting home and wearing a bra after a long day at work.
The bears had it right choosing to hibernate all winter.
I don’t want to rule the world… Just everything within a hundred square mile radius.
I always get this dream where I`m driving in reverse ...Then I wake up and see that I`m driving normally.
Nothing good ever came from drinking things that are on fire.
hell yeah !!!! i was the lucky sperm !!!!!
During the holidays people have to make a choice between enjoying the holidays or spending it with the relatives.