Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Ladys, if you`re in an argument with a guy and there`s no may to win. Start playing with your boobs...works every time.
A bee will knowingly risk its own life just to cause you a little pain. I can totally relate to that feeling.
Mosquito (noun) - Mother Nature`s way of getting you to slap yourself.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning.
I can`t be trusted with your alphabet magnets.
Saying “sounds good” is probably the nicest way to abruptly end a conversation.
If you`ve had cats, the singles virus may already be inside you.
My friend offered me a free pole dance class. I said no. With my debt, the last thing I need to find out is that I`m great at pole dancing.
your status deserves a standing ovation but I`m lazy I`ll just click `like`
Just a word of advice for all you single guys having a hard time out there, Forget the clubs, forget the churches, forget the online dating sites, as the best places to meet single women are the freezer section and down the cat food isle.....
Eleanor Roosevelt once said "Do one thing every day that scares you" and that`s why I weigh myself in the mornings.
Paintball is much more fun when the other people at Walmart don’t know we are playing.
I need a fixed income. Mine is broken.
This post was going to be really funny but I didn`t write it down because I was totally sure I`d remember it.
I thought we had nothing in common until I saw you buying 3 margaritas at a time.