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I`m not shy. I`m just being quiet because I know that if I open my mouth to speak, a flow of never- ceasing, insulting comment directed at you will immediately spew from within me.
Explain to me the down side of being under house arrest.
Do you ever wonder how many people’s dreams you have been in?
Well I didn`t know that minding my own business becomes part of your business to mind
Don’t run with scissors — unless you’re stealing scissors, of course. If so, run. Run like the wind scissor thief!
Always finish your beer. There`s sober kids in Africa.
If someone says they`ll always be there for you...make sure you find out exactly where "there" is.
I saw Tom Hanks and asked for his autograph. He abbreviated it, and it just said "Thanks"
When I see a shoe on the side of the road I wonder if Cinderella is in a nearby house.
On a scale of 1-10, I give this day a middle finger.
I’m not implying you’re stupid. I’m saying it outright. Here, I wrote it in crayon to help you understand.
People at airports must not workout much because they are all using these treadmills wrong...
I feel like grabbing some random kid and screaming "I`m YOU from the future!"
I thought there was a spider on the rug but it was just yarn.....it`s dead yarn now, though.