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Roses are red Your thong is pink Cover that up You`re not as hot as you think.
I try to get in at least 30 minutes of talking about exercise every day.
Dear person reading this, I could be naked right now and you would never know.
I think about hiring a maid way too often for someone who has plenty of time to clean.
Your gene pool should be drained, the area bleached & the ground burned & salted. But other than that you seem like a great person.
Nice try "Private Caller", but I wont`t answer even if I know you.
is pondering why people have a favorite color M&M when they all taste the same!
Likes doing tokyo drifts with the shopping carts when I round the corner of each isle at Walmart.
Story of my life : 1. i wake up .... 2. i go to school.... 3. i see a girl .... 4. i run to her and kiss her.... Actually, the right order is 2,3,4,1 ..
When you`re a kid, you hate those moments when there is absolutely nothing to do. As an adult, you live for them.
I like my coffee like I like my men: caffeinated, made of beans, muscular, tousled hair, you know what, I don`t really know how to do this..
My wife accused me of spending too much time on Facebook. That’s funny, when did I get a wife?
My facebook has been rated PG for Poor Guy
I`m terribly conflicted when people I hate from work, bring cupcakes.
A friend like you is worth a million dollars. So, if you don’t mind…can I sell you?