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If my statuses had a smell.. they would smell funny
My kids keep bugging me about dinner even after I told them I already ate...
I love work; it fascinates me. I can sit and watch folks do it for hours.
Job interview: Please tell us why you’d love to work for us? ME: I need money :)
I`m watching a show about surviving in the wild in case I ever decide to log off and go outside.
I don`t really care who wins the elections as long as everyone had fun out there.
A boob job sounds like the best job in the world.
"Just Be yourself" is something I rarely hear from people who know me well.
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
is wondering where noah kept woodpeckers on his ark
You are not stupid, I just think you have bad luck when thinking.
My best stories always end with the words ... "and then I got the hell out of there."
Take time to reflect upon your day. Think of all the blessings you received, and everything you may be called to testify about :)))
I never used to mind my wife hitting me in the face as she climaxed until I found out she was faking it.
Some people are just beautifully wrapped boxes of crap.