Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Olympic Mens Ice Hockey USA vs Canada. Loser keeps Justin Bieber.
In my head I sound like the Queen of England bitches!
A pessimist thinks that all women are sluts. An optimist hopes that they are.
Hey pigs, stop trying to swallow entire apples. You keep dying!
I saw a baby wearing a bib that said, “This dumbass put my cape on backwards”
My internet went down. By which I mean my neighbors changed their password.
they say money cant buy you happiness but id much rather be crying in a fararri...
A wise man once told me `Never sleep with your a$$ itching.. You`ll wake up with smelly fingers`
I thought an emu was when you sent someone a cow via cyber mail.
The only thing my girlfriend blows is everything out of proportion.
Who’s that sexy beast…………..oh I clicked on my own profile again. ;)
I hate when the remote is way over there
YOU ARE NOT THE BOSS OF ME is not a good thing to say to your boss.
"Hey bro shotgun this beer" No I don`t drink "You wanna be cool don`t you?" I don`t drink "C`mon NERD!" Grandma PLEASE stop
Dear life, When I asked if my day could get worse it was a rhetorical question not a challenge.