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You`re only limited by your own imagination! And money. And talent. And genetics. And time. And other people. Go for it!
Smelling another person should be a choice. Just sayin’
I don`t know how the law of averages works, but you`d think after 25yrs of marriage I`d be right at least once
I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.
Your family tree must look like a cactus........everybody on it is a pr!ck
I have enough leftover Halloween candy to get me to leftover Valentine`s Day candy time.
My mission is to be the first person on Facbook to have one million people on their block list. . .
You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can`t flick your friends out the car window
Last time I saw jugs that big, 2 hillbillies were blowing on them.
I`m angrier than a waitress forced to sing happy birthday
According to the police, public masturbation is not considered a "street performance". Even if you have a hat on the ground on front of you.
Why are you walking away when we`re in the middle of discussing our wedding plans? Come back! ... At least give me your number!
Why would a married man buy a hearing aid?
Being all talk and no action sounds relaxing.
Sometimes, when dealing with people, you can`t help but stop and think, "Yup, I`m about to get my first assault charge."