Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
You never know what you are missing,until you clean your room.
Can`t afford P90X or INSANITY workout videos? Go find a wasp nest and slap the sh!t out of it. Never knew I could shadow box,bicycle kick,and twirl while floating.
I`m not a psychologist,,, but I remember when a Hot Wheels track magically cured 80% of ADHD
I hate girls who insert the phrase "my boyfriend" into every conversation. So does my boyfriend.
Every time I see a safety warning on a product I can`t help think to myself how natural selection has failed us once again...
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning.
The only people who care about my college degree are the college loan people.
Friendship must be built on a solid foundation of alcohol, nudity, inappropriateness, and shenanigans.
Mom: You haven`t moved since I left 5 hours ago? Me: Excuse me, where do you think these chips came from!!???
Fun: text a friend "Are you alone right now?" They go "Yes." Then u text back LOL
I ordered some bubble wrap online. It arrived in a box surrounded by packing peanuts.
Took my 3rd self-defense class, so if anyone feels like attacking me straight on, very slowly, w/ a fake knife in their right hand, BRING IT
Some people lack the ability to laugh at themselves ...That`s where I come in...
Living out of your car isn`t so bad if you keep telling yourself you`re "on tour"
I`m so, so sorry I started the whole Facebook Is Going To Start Charging thing. I didn`t think it would go THIS far..... sorry